House One has received some very mysterious neighbours. They’re a motley bunch. They’re close-by. And they’re also completely fictitious. That’s right peeps, our 12 Housemates have fallen for Big Brother’s stunt hook, line and sinker!

Sonia let the cat out of the bag in a planned slip-up last night and that very large cat has ruffled some very groomed feathers. And now that the secret’s out amongst our flabbergasted pigeons – they’re shaping up for the competition of their lives … pity that they’re the only ones playing! Isn’t Big Brother deceptive? Still, it seems he’s the one who got the cream!

The initial shock gave way to scepticism from only a surprising few. Layla was convinced it was a joke. But as the night wore on, their suspicions gave way to silence as they all mulled the prospect over. Late that night, BB confirmed a dreadful mistake was made. The HMs saw something that shouldn’t have. Big Brother needed their understanding. The tables had been turned. And that was enough to get the full buy-in of all the HMs. Instantly – and awesomely.

Possibly the one with the strongest reaction was Michael. He alternated between sulking, snapping and silence. The overall feeling I got was that he doesn’t like to be made a fool of… and he doesn’t like the idea that someone got one over him. I suspect he was also starting to feel a little bit confident as to his place in the House… and this bombshell shakes that up.

The House was immediately divided into two camps – those who thought the HMs needed to push themselves to be the best they could be and those who were busy doing some solid solo back patting and celebrating how amazing they were, just the way they are. Michael was most definitely the leader of camp number two. “This is not gonna change the way we do anything,” he said strongly. “I don’t want anyone to push anyone to work out,” he added. “I do not want anyone ever to tell me what to do.”

Michael has actually been a little bit defensive lately whenever anyone has suggested he make some personal changes. He snapped at Layla when she volunteered the idea they should all make their beds in the morning, defiantly stating that wasn’t what he did in his normal life so why should he change here? He snapped at Bradley when he suggested the HMs curb their swearing, essentially saying he would ****king swear if he *****ing well wanted to, because that was just the person he was. So Sarah’s passionate idea that they all be their very best selves (insert mental motivational meme here) did not sit too comfortably with the long haired genius, who quite enjoys his status quo.

Ever the thinker, Michael also asked BB if the HMs could base their Nominations on the fact there is a second House… something that clicked immediately with all the HMs. Ray was swift to point out what makes him valuable. “Everyone knows that I’m the most competitive. I can hold my breath the longest underwater. I can do the most push-ups.” Look out ladies! How will THIS change the Nom-Noms tonight? Sounds like a very good excuse to fling someone under the bus to me… (and flashbacks of Survivor and Tribal Council are flooding my brain!)

Despite Michael’s reserve, many of the HMs have agreed they need to get fitter (seemingly believing all the challenges will be physical) and more emotionally “ready”. Brace yourselves – Sarah and Benjamin are leading the charge when it comes to the soul searching!

Later that night, the HMs were given a glimpse into “highlights” of the second House (check it out above!). Most of them stared at the screen with wide eyes, hands clasped to mouths as they lapped up every second of it. “It’s the intellectuals versus whatever that was,” said Estelle. “I feel cheated on,” Stacey said sadly, as Layla pronounced, “They all look like idiots”. Michael quickly replied, “Don’t say that,” before quietly adding, “They are way better looking.”

Perhaps as consolation, George gave Layla a dirty big pash in the Kitchen, which quite possibly further confused their “boundaries” – at least for our Princess. Later that night, let’s just say they further confused boundaries, as the makeout session continued when the lights went off.

Today, BB set their first House v House challenge… which added fuel to the “we must get fitter!” frenetic fire as it was a time-trialled marathon. (More on that later).

After the challenge, the HMs gathered in the Lounge and was shown a second batch of footage of their “rivals”. For a group of 12 whose brains had been churning all night and day long, the syrupy sweet scene was too much. “Guys, I actually have a hunch that we have been stitched up,” said Benjamin.

Ahh, but we all know how insidious just one small kernel of doubt can be. Multiply that by 12, add $250 000 and I’ll let you put together the answer… the HMs are in. And they’re nervous… very nervous.

Finally, here’s one final hot tip for you… Surly’s cover might have been blown! Ben sneaked up on Zoe the other day when she received her challenge from him and today, Layla overheard Zoe finishing another chat! “Maybe Surly can talk…?” Layla mused to George and Michael later. The intellectual House indeed!

Little Sis