The last time a group of Housemates boarded the BB Airways they were Bali-bound! The new set of travellers had reason to suspect that they’d be soaking up the sun pool-side with drinks in hand and fine food on cue.
“Passengers! Welcome to your destination!” Captain Big Brother announced. “Thank you for flying Big Brother Airlines. We trust that you enjoyed your flight and we hope you have a fantastic holiday!”
But as the Housemates disembarked the airplane and emerged into their holiday locale, they were surprised to find that the picture-postcard destination had disappeared and in its place was … well … a dump.
There was, in short, nothing fantastic about it. Mattresses piled on milk crates, tufts of dried grass, rubbish strewn everywhere, graffiti-adorned walls and a dirty pond at the centre of it all. It certainly wasn’t anything to write home about.
Nobbi surveyed his surroundings, nodding his head. “Yep.”
Ben was not impressed either. “Dude,” he muttered in disbelief.
“Oh sick,” Rory sneered.
“What the hell man?” Ben complained.
“No, no, serious dude!” Nobbi exploded. “Why do I have to get shafted every time? No, seriously, every time!”
“Dude!” Ben chimed in with a clang. “Why does my life suck so much? I was looking forward to this so much. I actually hate my life. I’m actually sick of this.”
Bianca had no words. She looked incredibly dejected as she kicked the debris at her feet.
“This is Big Brother,” BB announced. “Welcome to The Dump. Enjoy your stay.”
“Welcome to the end of the world!” Nobbi flat-lined sarcastically.
“This is bullcrap! Why did we get luxury travel bags?” Ben sighed, not quite grasping Big Brother’s sense of humour.
“How is this a reward?” Nobbi bellowed. “Yuck!”
Rory found the situation completely amusing. He giggled as he pointed out where the bath, the king size beds, deck and swimming pool used to be.
“Get me out of here!” Nobbi screamed.
“I would actually cry if I had the energy,” Bianca murmured. But she didn’t, so she couldn’t.
The four kicked about the space, grumbling and swearing as they reminisced about the cosy home they had left behind hours ago but was only metres away.
