After their water cooler chat, Bianca was still pushing the ‘Why-won’t-Ben-spoon-with-me?’ envelope. She decided to broach the topic with him again, but this time made sure there were enough people around to get a second opinion.
“I still don’t understand why you don’t hug people,” Bianca asked Ben in front of Rima and Rory in the bedroom. “I just don’t get it.”
“Oh, you don’t like to hug people Benny?” Rima asked innocently.
“B’s been trying to get Benny to spoon at night and Benny doesn’t want to,” Rory gave Rima the 101. “Oh, what’s your reason?” Rima questioned Ben. “I want to know.”
“I don’t do it for the sake of it,” Ben told the group. “I only really do it with the chicks that I’m sexually involved with.”
“Oh really?” Rima said, intrigued. “You obviously feel uncomfortable. There’s a level of discomfort …”
“Well how about someone spooning you?” Rima suggested. “Do you like to be spooned?” But Ben put a veto on a reverse-spoon. “No that would be even weirder,” he replied.
“Ben, I respect it,” Bianca declared. “That’s why I’m not going to keep bothering you. It’s weird because I’m Italian and like hugging people is the least of my worries. I kiss people to say hello sometimes.”
But Ben wasn’t saying ‘hello’ to Bianca, he wasn’t even saying a ‘hi’ in passing, he moved away from Bianca on the bed and struck up a conversation with Rory. But as Rorza turned in for the night, Ben asked the Brickie what had happened to the sleepover the two had planned to have in the Kombi.
“Seriously maybe tomorrow man,” Rory said. “Go with B tonight. If B wants to go, go with B.” Ben, forced into a corner, timidly asked Bianca, “Coming to the Kombi?”
“Yeah,” Bianca considered. “If Rory’s out there, yeah.” Rory gave B the bad news. “I don’t think I’m going tonight man.”
“Rory’s lost his penis,” Ben quipped. “Dude, I have a penis, that’s why I would hug B,” Rory shot back.
Later, in the Kombi Ben and Bianca were joined by Terri, Brigitte and Cherry. The latter was up for some major teasing and when the opportunity presented itself.
“What are you doing Mr Awkward?” Cherry said bluntly. “If you’re allowed to call me Mr Abs, I’m calling you Mr Awkward. Or Bawkward. Benny awkward.”
It was an icy comment and perhaps it lingered in Ben’s mind because he tossed and turned alongside Bianca until the wee hours of the morning, finally muttering: “I’m cold.”
“I’m cold too,” Bianca replied sleepily. “We could spoon for body warmth.”
So Ben did, embracing the Italian Princess at last. “If you cough on me or kick me in the nuts or pinch my arms, I will kill you,” he warned.
And in the – yes – awkward position, Ben tried to smooth over the – yes – awkward silence by humming a tune. Bianca was puzzled by the impromptu performance. “Serenading me to sleep?” she asked. “It’s what I always wanted.”
And as quick as the spooning started, it stopped. “I’m done with this spooning shit Bianca,” Ben told Bianca.
“You’re a bad spooner anyway,” Bianca informed him. “Rory has this spooning thing down to an art.”
“I don’t know what to do with this arm,” Ben’s arm flailed about beside Bianca. “It just sort of chills there.”
“Everyone knows how to spoon,” Bianca scoffed. “It’s meant to just happen.”
“Well this has just happen?” Ben said, looking at the twisted spooning position they’d both got themselves into.
“We’re supposed to be in the same crevice,” Bianca said. “Not all gappy.”
Ben tried to re-adjust, but hurt Bianca in the process, “Ow!” she complained. “Cherry was right. You are so awkward.”
With that, the pair gave up. Bianca finally got the message that while the mind may have been willing, the body certainly wasn’t. The writing was all over the Kombi wall: He’s just not that into you.
